But why say it? Why write it? I still havent rescheduled my therapy appointment. Why bother? Justin seems to have me all figured out anyway. I still read his entries on myspace. He's wrong about one thing though, I'm not angry. I'm sad, lost and alone. He hasn't actually moved back in but he's got a bit of clothes here and sleeps here every night. Why? I dont know. I guess I gave up.
You see? I have so much more but I just sit here and think it instead. It doesnt come out.
Tomorrow is picture day so I have to shave Ian and Derrick tonight. We arent paying for their pictures but they are still going to be in the class one. James needs to be reshaved too, he has some missed hairs.
Justin is dropping the kids off at his moms house right now. Ian almost didn't get to go because Justin is a fucking idiot. Ian was wearing track pants and it's 100 degrees outside so Justin MADE him change into shorts. Ian threw a huge fit over it so while Justin was holding Ian in his lap to force his shoes on I grabbed Ian and dragged him to the bedroom and told Justin to just leave without him. But of course it always takes Justin for freaking ever to get everything together so Ian eventually came out, still crying and arguing with his brothers, and he was allowed to go. Fine whatever, I'll enjoy the quiet. Justin wanted me to go to my moms house with him to help with the side yard but A) it's 100 fucking degrees out there and B) the guys arent coming to fix the windows until monday which means it could be finished tomorrow or the next day or the next day or the next fucking day when it's cooler and not right now!
Justin just wont be able to save himself from today. It's his fucking fault we weren't home when te UPS guy came with my phone. Then pissing off Ian. Then telling me he talked to Liz AGAIN today. Yeah...
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